Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Secebis ketenangan



Beberapa hari lepas, kepala ini terasa amat berserabut. Apa yang dibuat serba tidak kena. Artikel dibaca bersilih ganti. Tangan pula mencari-cari kekunci huruf cuba mengolah ayat. Semuanya hendak dilakukan serentak. Menggelabah sekali. Mata sentiasa bergenang dan berkaca-kaca, jika ada yang bertanyakan (mengenai kerja) sudah tentu berderaian air mata. Alhamdulillah suami sentiasa menemani dan memahami.
Hari ini berbeza.
‘Mak doakan kamu hari-hari’
Terima kasih mak. Terima kasih mak yang telah mendoakan saya hari-hari..kerja saya terasa amat lancar pada hari ini. Gembira rasanya mendengar suara mak di corong telefon. Saya juga mendoakan mak dan abah sentiasa berada di dalam perlindungan Allah swt, dijauhkan kesusahan dan menjadi ahli syurga insyaAllah. InsyaAllah, saya akan buat sehabis baik. Semoga perjalanan kalian ke tanah suci Makkah berjalan lancar, dimakbulkan kesemua doa dan diterima amalannya. Amin.

Friday, February 15, 2013

I think I need a break

My eyes went watery. My fingers kept scrolling down the pdf document on may laptop. It was too long. And that was only one out the many.  My laptop then started to become slow.  I checked the number of pdfs opened. Argh. 20?
I am now trying to figure out the most effective way to deal with the cases. I have read a case so many times- for the part which concerns my research. Each time for a different perspective. I am now using the nitro acrobat reader so that I could highlight and put comments on them. But my eyes signalled me for some other way. They get sour. This is not leisure reading. This is analysis. Printing? I am not too sure, considering the volume.


I think I need a break. 


Wednesday, February 13, 2013

I had to start somewhere, and I have started it..

I decided to have a slow walk to the university today, taking fresh breeze of air and toiling around a few cases that I have read in the morning. I was trying to make the connections between the cases and the flow of the thesis, figuring out a sound analysis to put through. ‘ Law is tough’, I recalled what a person responded to me when I told him I was doing law. ’Well, err..’ I said, not too sure of what to say. 'All subjects are tough' I responded. I knew all along that law was tough, and I have infact thought it was tougher than many other professional disciplines (especially when I was overwhelmed with the long chain of cases, AND the analyses)…but to have somebody saying that to me, emphasizing it, made me thought that I was not alone in thinking that way. Well of course, I do not want to risk claiming that as I know students of other fields e.g civil engineering, medicine etc have their own obstacles in lab experiments and god knows what. Its relative. It is just the constant exercise of the mental faculty that makes me exhausted at times. I however feel very fortunate for the chance of being exposed to the area of study I'm doing, despite rather late (well, comparatively to the younger ones...) I saw many others have had proper exposure to this subject in taught classes during the masters programme. But as I have always thought, I have to start somewehere, and it must not necessarily be in order. Due to all this being new to me, I feel vibrantly excited to the new facts I found although sometimes it brought me down a little only to know that everybody else have talked about it in many articles..they are not new afterall. But I can do it! Allah swt helps! Now snow is melting. It was very beautiful today. It is the second blast of the season. But I know it will not be as beautiful tomorrow. It is sentimental this year.